Tuesday, July 27, 2010

An Old Friend Missed

Chasing a Catharsis

Back in Ohio after an absence of over 30 years.  I was there to do some work for a client in Columbus.  The job required a couple of weekend layovers. I took advantage of that chance to look up some junior high and high school friends in Huron, a small town on Lake Erie about 120 miles north of Columbus.  Huron is a town of around 7,000 in the winter.  In the summer it used to swell to twice that size, filling with inland folks who wanted to spend time on the lake.

The roads between Columbus and Lake Erie are remarkable in the spring.  They are filled with beautiful rolling hills, picturesque farms and dense forests. It was wonderful to see them again and great to be on my way to a town where I had spent many of my formative years. We moved around a lot when I was a kid but to me Huron was my hometown so you can imagine I was pretty fired up about the trip.   The fact that I got to be dazzled by the countryside while on my way was just frosting on the proverbial cake.

One friend I would not see on this trip however was Tom Cook.  Tom was a classmate of mine in the ninth and tenth grades.  At that time we both lived in Laylin’s Court just outside of Huron. Laylin’s was a blue-collar combination of cottages and house trailers right on the beach of Lake Erie.  Some folks lived there year ‘round and that’s what we did in one of the rental cottages.  Others, the ones with a few extra bucks, owned most of the trailers and would come in mainly from the Cleveland area to spend summer weekends.
Tom Cook, George Walbeck, TC, Jim Cunningham,
(Dick Haley not pictured)
Franklin's Flat Camping

Tom was a couple of years older than me and was behind a couple of years of school.  That put us in the same grade.  He was sure smart enough so I think he had flunked because school was never important to him.  He had worked part time and had received a little financial help from his Mom so he could have a car. It was a ’38 Plymouth I think, bone stock and in fairly decrepit condition.  It was beautiful to me though because it represented a certain freedom I did not yet have.

The summer before my freshman year I was working toward attending the Maryknoll missionary high school in Syracuse, New York in preparation for the seminary.  I don’t think I had any particular calling.  I was just thirteen and it sounded like a cool thing to do.  It just seemed to be a logical next step from my experience at Huron’s Saint Peter’s Catholic elementary school.  I had interviewed with a couple of traveling Maryknoll priests and was an active candidate for the school.  

But then one day I was swimming in Lake Erie just off the beach where our cottages were and I met a girl named Patty. 

Her folks were Irish or Scottish immigrants and they had just moved up from the South as so many did during that time to work in the auto factories.  Patty was a beauty with a killer smile.  We swapped some insults and in the process I noticed she had this beguiling way of talking with a combined Scottish and southern accent.  It was love at first sight, or so I thought, so I immediately dumped the missionary idea in favor of more basic instincts.  When high school started Patty took the place by storm and had all kinds of guys chasing her so my time in her life was limited. 

Eventually a guy named Dick took center stage with Patty.  I guess he was a little jealous of me though because he started rattling my cage.  For example, once I was standing by my locker in between classes with a load of books tucked under my arm when he came up behind me and tipped them out of my arm to the floor.  I just stood there thinking; “What was that?”  I didn’t know whether it was a simple joke or an act of aggression but I had my suspicions. 

Now Dick was over six feet tall and I was probably five and a half feet tall at the time.  One day I headed into the bathroom in our school cafeteria.  Tom Cook was behind me.  As I entered, Tom pinned my arms behind me and Dick, who was standing in front of me, shoved a fruit pie in my face.  Just as he did that, Tom released my arms and I caught most of the fruit pie as it fell.  Instinctively, I shoved the pie right back in Dick’s face. 

Dick grabbed my shirt and punched me in the chin.  It wasn’t very hard though.  I think we were both pretty surprised by the events that had just occurred.  He stood there looking shocked and that was pretty much the end of the incident.  Except…from that point Dick and Tom were my friends.

Dick and I would later sign on to work in Cedar Point's Hotel Breakers - on the clipper and busing tables.  It was a daily summer commute we often punctuated by stopping at the A&W for chili dogs and an orange soda. It’s funny how these things go when you are a kid…how friendships can arise out of conflict.

Tom had a real ironic outlook on things and, in my completely uninformed naive opinion, a ton of common sense. He had a tendency to curl his lip and smile in good times and bad. So you always thought he maybe knew something (About life? About the situation?) that no one else did.  He also smoked, drank and knew all the standard cuss words.  This gave him that grown up and worldly aura that impressed our whole crowd.

I was just learning things like how to cuss and, in fact, would often engage in conversations where I would find myself using completely unfamiliar words.  What I mean is I didn’t know what part of the anatomy or what sort of activity they were referring to.  I was clueless in a very "ignorance is bliss" sort of way.

Tom also had this combination flat top and duck tail hairstyle with a curl centered in front. I think the Italians from the “Little Italy” section of Huron referred to the curl as a “pachuco.” I believe “pachuco” had some vague reference to being a gang member or something.  I didn’t know how he got his hair to do that but I knew I wanted mine to do the same thing and it wouldn’t quite work, no matter how heavy I loaded it down with whatever greasy substance was at hand. 

Tom would do 50 pushups and 50 sit ups at the start of his day, every day that I knew him which was at least a couple of years.  I don’t know where he got the motivation– maybe he wanted to stay in shape for football.  I was in awe and to this day wish I had thought to imitate him.  Also, he had that car which to me was a symbol of complete independence. 

I was just coming out of eighth grade and a very sheltered existence as a student at Saint Peter’s so you can see that Tom was the coolest person I had ever met up to that point.  He was a classic teen angel and bad looking dude and my first hero.  I was the “wannabe” but I learned fast. 

Tom always treated me pretty square.  Since we were neighbors, I hung around bugging him a lot and he would give me rides to school.  We also hung out together from time to time– attending area school dances, beer parties (!), camping and so on. I appreciated that a lot.  After all, I am sure I was just a naïve broke kid in his eyes. I didn’t have much to contribute to the relationship but for some unknown reason, Tom put up with me.

I lost touch with Tom after moving from Ohio to Seattle, Washington in 1962 in the middle of my junior year.  I never forgot him though.  Then, sometime in the Eighties I was on the phone talking to another old friend from those days who was still living in Huron, Dave Sprankel. 

He told me in the late 70's Tom had been on his motorcycle and had a fatal encounter with a billboard.  He also told me Tom had always been the first in the area to get the newest machine, things like snowmobiles, bikes and so on.  I don’t know why I wasn’t surprised, about the machines that is.  It sort of sounded like Tom I guess.  Tom had only made it to his late 30’s.  If I could spend five minutes talking to him right now today I’ll bet we would both be rolling on the floor in laughter over those amazing high school days.  We would certainly share a common love for motorcycles.

A Jog in the Rain

And so, while I was in Huron I decided to try and find Tom and pay my last respects even though I was twenty years late.  My old friend Dave did a little investigating and handed me a slip of paper with Tom’s plot information on it.  I found out the cemetery was a couple of miles from town and decided to jog out there to see him on an early morning visit.

It was a little cloudy but very pleasant when I left Captain Montague's B&B where I was staying. I took off at an easy jogging pace looking forward to the visit and not worrying about the weather at all.  I had received directions and took the turns I thought I was supposed to be taking but there was a lot of farmland out there and I was getting a little concerned about getting lost.  Then, it started raining. 

It was a fairly heavy but warm rain and was comfortable enough so I decided to press on with the jogging.  Just when I was getting pretty soaked and thinking I would turn around, I saw the cemetery ahead.  I went in and began looking for Tom.  It took me a while to figure out how the plots were laid out.  At the very moment I did find him though, it stopped raining. 

I know it was just a coincidence but it doesn’t take too much imagination to think it could have been Tom’s way of saying, “Hey, glad you could visit!  What?  Are you just stopping by so you can bum a ride to school?” 

I hadn’t figured out what to say when I got there.  So, I just said, “Tom.  We had some great times together.  I loved you like a brother, I have missed you and I will never forget you.  I will see you again.”

*****

Note: This story would later be a dedication to Tom in my book about riding Harley Davidson's; "Badass."  A few years ago I tracked down Tom's son through an old pal in Ohio.  I called him to mention I was an old friend and ask if I could send him a copy of my book dedicated to his father, free of course.  I thought he might like a story about his Dad.  Must have caught him in a bad moment as he declined. I still don't don't know why and I still don't know his Mother's (Tom's wife?) name.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Ciudad Juarez

1964.
Cannon Air Force Base, Clovis New Mexico
He was a Preventive Medicine Specialist
For the Air Force
Duties: Industrial Hygiene, Toxicology,
Environmental Medicine, Public Health
Everything from swimming pool inspections
To Mosquito collection and identification
To VD interviews

He once rode a helicopter on a mapping expedition
Of the base perimeter to identify potential mosquito breeding areas.
He once rode an ambulance as a volunteer to physically extricate
The remains of a F-100 jet pilot who flew into the ground.
He once interviewed a husband and wife, together
About which was the source of their gonorrhea infection
(They both pointed at each other.)


His buddy, William K. Smith
Was a Flight Surgeon technician
On flying status
Collecting a few extra bucks a month for it.

They were heading out for a weekend in Juarez
About 300 miles Southwest of Clovis
They got off late on a Friday afternoon
And stopped a little over half way
At another friend's mom's home
In Tularosa, New Mexico
The next morning... 'Mom' made them
New Mexico style enchiladas for breakfast
Small corn tortillas, stacked about 3 inches high
Each layer with sauce, or beef, or cheese or frijoles
All topped with a fried egg
They were so hot they made the Airman's eyebrows sweat.
Still, to this day the best enchiladas he has ever had

They spent the day in Juarez, roaming from bar to bar
As teenage Airman would do
Whiskey sours for a quarter
Each bar with a line of woman outside and in
Groping and trying to catch attention for a quickie
And a stage for the ladies to take turns strutting their stuff

At their last stop of the evening
They sat in chairs that directly faced the bar's semi-circular stage
And ordered beers
It was better than a bird's eye view

Finally, one of the seasoned strippers
Hit the stage and between entertaining the whole crowd
Would occasionally squat directly in front of one of the
Guys drinking at the stage

She was working her way systematically from her left to right
And sure enough, she stopped in front of the
Barely 18 year old, small town Ohio ex-altar boy
He was doing his best to look composed as the two
Were also bathed in the bar's spotlight

While she was in front of him trying to tantalize everyone
He chose to casually pick up his beer and take a swig
Then return it to the stage in front of them
He managed to complete that task before she
Figured out what he was up to
But the she had his number

She bent real close to him
Smiling and moving provocatively
Then took both breasts in hand and
Smacked him on both sides of the face
One right after the other
In the process knocking his glasses so they sat
At a 45 degree angle
The audience roared
And the Airman turned deep sheets of red


The rites of passage
Some never leave you

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

The Test (for Samantha)

Philosophy 101
Gotta have it to graduate
*************************************
He was on a crash course through college
Working full-time as an Air Force Airman
Attending night classes to graduate with a BA
While serving at four locations (assignments)
Two in California
One in Thailand
One in Arizona
All in under three and a half years
It was all made possible because
Courses could be successfully challenged
Under the College Level Entrance Program tests
And others could be taken in accelerated, shortened terms
Plus, the Air Force had a Bootstrap program
They sponsored the last ten months full-time 

But still... there was The Test.
Glendale Arizona Community College
Night class in Philosophy
The professor didn't want to be there
The students didn't want to be there
No one wanted to be there
Four hours a night
Two days a week
For eight weeks

The professor lectured
The students took notes
The professor didn't like
Philosophical discussions
He just kept lecturing

Finals approached
The professor gave his students a break (?)
He wrote four topics on the blackboard
"I will include three of these on the final, essay exam."
The Airman went home to his wife
Who was also working full-time
He said, "Gotta' study. Please help."
Without hesitation she said, "Okay."

First, he cleaned up his notes
On the potential four essay topics
In meticulous outline form
To four levels:
I. Roman Numerals
     A. Capital Letters
         1.  Natural Numbers
               a. Lower Case Letters

Then he started memorizing
First all the Roman Numerals
Next all the Capital Letters
And so on

In the latter stages
She would follow his notes
While he laid on the couch
Moaning and groaning
Trying to memorize
And recite the seemingly endless notes
None of it made any sense to him
But he just packed the information in
************************************
The night of finals
His professor wrote 3 of the 4 essay questions
On the blackboard
No stated time limit
The student started writing
Not the essay
Just his outlined notes

Much later...
He began transforming
His notes to long hand
Note style to essay style

Much later...
The student looked up
All the others were gone
Just the professor and the student remained
Still not quite half way done
He wrote a little more
Than made a decision

He gathered all his papers...essay and notes
Stood and walked to the professor's desk
"Look, I still have a lot to do here.
But if you will review what I have done so far
And agree to give me an "A" for the final
We can both go home."

The professor looked at the papers
Than focused on the notes and said,
"Did you bring these in with you?"
"No!" said the student
"I just wrote them out tonight
Right after you posted the questions on the board."

The professor said, "Done."
They both went home.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Campbell Ranch Dominates NorCal Landscape

This will be a photo essay - that soon will be snatched for $billions$ in movie rights...
(Please note... if you click once on each photo as you go they will probably fill your screen - making it all the more stunning in its splendiferous beauty, wonder and scientifically inaccurate detail. When you finish looking at the photo, just click the back arrow to return to this electrifying treatise.)

Not many of you know we, the Campbells, are
Carpetbagger, robber barons
Who have ravaged Northern California
While amassing vast holdings in land
An embarrassment of riches so to speak
Its not a big deal... just how we roll
So as Kenye West says; "ima letchu finish" this with your own thoughts

To get you started I am going to plant a few notions:

First, you want to know how I did it
Well, it was through blatant use of migrant farm workers
Here's one now taking a break (goofing off)
In the back yard of our vast estate.
Claims her name is Julieann and we're married (yeah right)
(photo r. undocumented farm worker who already shows signs of US patriotism by wearing a weird stars and stripes hat)



Next in the "how I did it" department
We need to observe the huge crop (millions of acres)
Of loaded  tomato plants growing in our huge truck farm
There are also millions of acres of basil,
Sweet peppers, and chives there
Although you may not be able to tell because the photo
Has been taken by satellite.
Millions of miles away
(photo r. high resolution satellite image)


You are also curious about where I store
My huge herd of thoroughbreds here in NorCal
Truth is I no longer have them
As my migrant farm worker has taken
Over the horse barn
And filled it with large plastic storage boxes
That contain seasonal bric-a-brac decorations
Anywhere from one to 8 boxes per holiday
With Christmas coming in first of course
(photo r. former gigantic horse barn)

Having seen all this, I know many of you
Are wondering and hoping that we have
Luxurious, palatial guest accommodations
Available here on the estate
Well of course.  Don't be ridiculous.
If you should be invited to visit (you won't)
Your cottage is prepared and includes
All the comforts you are accustomed to
No bed, no bath, a four foot tall grand main entry
Two, that's right,  two side windows
And a 2.5' by 4' grand Southern style
Front porch that holds (0) relaxing rocking chairs
(photo r. commodious guest quarters)

Rumor has it that the guest house
Was built by her Grandfather and cousin
As a playhouse for Samantha Campbell
But hey, that is just a rumor

No folks that's not the end of it
A couple more features to titillate you here
A gigantic grove of (2) cork oak trees!
(Click on THIS photo and you will see some 
Really cool, gnarly [really] bark!)
Yes, thats right
For all you cork lovers out there
Why, heres one now!
Notice how it likes to grow in odd directions
(Much like me)
Wandering around our stupendous NorCal acreage
(photo r. Cork oak growing where it wants)

Finally, when you have logged in as our distinguished guest
(that will never happen)
You will next question whether there is a place to bask in the sun
And wonder at the magnificent Tahoe Blue swimming pool
Well, there isn't
I mean there is a pool
But it belongs exclusively to our dog Molly
And she will not allow you to use it unless
You know how to throw a tennis ball
A trick few have mastered
(photo r. Molly in her pool being observed by 
Arizona immigration law refugee)

For info and a long, exhausting preview about how we got to this point click here: "Travel On"  

Friday, July 9, 2010

Atlas Shrugged




Yes, they are making a movie!  

But, and this is a really big but, they are casting it with unknowns (at least to me anyway).

Hopefully it won't have Ayn's fans, me included, shrugging.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

This is... Love

A bond that shrugs off the first blush
That grows through pain
That is nurtured by forgiveness
A bond that seeks balance
That defines life with the start of new life
That is fierce with devotion and tenderness
A bond that graduates to maturity
That is justified by success
That survives setback with determination
A bond that rests comfortably in silence
That celebrates the life of another
That finds peace in a touch
A bond that fosters faith in a shared eternity
With the one love and with the family
A bond that is nurtured with laughter

A bond relentless with hope
A bond that thrives on optimism
This is... Love.  Oh Yes it is!

(For Julieann Marie Campbell)